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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28692252">My Darling Mars</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frankensteins_Monster/pseuds/Frankensteins_Monster'>Frankensteins_Monster</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Night at the Museum (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cute, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fantasizing, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Jealousy, Kissing, Love, M/M, Mild Sexual Fantasy, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, No Smut, Pining, Spanking</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 07:47:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,556</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28692252</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frankensteins_Monster/pseuds/Frankensteins_Monster</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jedediah misunderstands Octavius’ response when he asks him about his relationship status, and ends up believing him to have a male lover named Mars.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jedediah/Octavius (Night at the Museum)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>129</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>My Darling Mars</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Do you have a wife? Or a lover or sumthin’?” Jedediah asked one day, curious to know more about Octavius. He had to have a girl back at home, what with him being so attractive and intelligent, and rather fun to be around.</p><p>Octavius seemed to mull it over. “I haven’t really had the time for any of that.” He says. “Or rather, I suppose you could say that Mars has been my master, as lately he occupies my every waking moment.”</p><p>Jedediah’s jaw dropped. Master? He? Mars? What? “M-master?” He blurted out, in shock. For some reason he couldn’t help but picture Octavius, bent over another man’s knee, getting spanked across the back of his skirt. And the fact that the image made Jedediah feel all sorts of complicating things, was something he planned to keep very much to himself, thank you very much!</p><p> </p><p>
  
</p><p> </p><p>Octavius looked slightly confused and shook his head before chuckling a little. “Is that so unusual? In Rome, such practices are commonplace. To begin the day, we generally prostrate ourselves-“</p><p>“Arrrgh! Ay! Ey! Enough!” Jedediah cried out, red-faced. “I get it! We’re a very… different sort of people!”</p><p>Octavius simply raised an eyebrow and said nothing.</p><p>Jedediah ran a hand back through his own longish hair, as he tried to collect himself. So Octavius was in a relationship with another man… that was not something that he had expected. And apparently Romans were real talky about that stuff too. It seemed that in Rome such things are commonplace, in fact! That was a surprise, given his cowboys weren’t exactly fond of the queer sorts of folk. Which… was a shame, for Jedediah at least. Because if he was completely honest, he had long suspected he might actually be one of the queer sorts of folk. Still, he felt that mayhaps the Romans took it too far. <strong>Master</strong>… he called him <strong>Master</strong>! For gosh sakes!</p><p>“Does he treat you alright?” Jedediah asked uncomfortably. He already hated this Mars fellow with the passion of a thousand burning suns for making Octavius call him <strong>Master</strong>. What a doggamned asshole!</p><p>Octavius shrugged. “Reasonably so.”</p><p>“Oh.” Jedediah said. He secretly hoped that Octavius might need rescuing of some sort from the utter bastard he’d been seeing.</p><p>“But what about you?” Octavius asked.</p><p>“Me?” Jedediah asked. “No, no. I’m way too busy with fighting, and exploring, and building that there railroad.” He pointed at the railroad in the diorama across from where they sat, atop a table that Larry had set up for them where they could survey both their territories together.</p><p>He grinned and shook his overgrown hair out of his eyes. “Boy, will it be grand!” He said, eyes shining. “As soon as Gigantor finally grows some balls and lets us blow a hole in that there mountainside.</p><p>Octavius clapped a hand on Jedediah’s shoulder, and suddenly Jedediah was far more aware of that little contact than he had ever been before of a casual touch.</p><p>“I’m sure the behemoth will eventually yield.” He said. “And it will be a fine railroad indeed.”</p><p>Jed slowly put his arm round Octavius’ shoulder and they sat there watching their respective worlds bustle about in the distance. Leaning into each other like a pair of good friends do. Jed trying to ignore the strange feelings smouldering inside of him at the casual, yet intimate touch.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Octavius was trying to ignore the feelings bubbling up inside of him at the casual, yet intimate touch.</p><p>He was rather surprised at Jedediah’s reaction to his worship of Mars. After all, if anyone could understand the constant lust to battle and conquer that Octavius practically lived by, he would have thought that it would be his Jedediah. They were always so in tune, so perfectly matched in their desire to prove themselves better, to come out on top. He honestly thought that Jed, had he been a Roman too, would have worshipped Mars himself! Because after all, Mars was the god of war! And conquering. And coming out on top.</p><p>And lately every time that Octavius prostrated himself to Mars, he thanked him for sending him an opponent as perfect as Jedediah. Because Jed in a way, completed him. The little cowboy was a constant challenge for him to overcome, with a sharp mind and a great smile. And above all, he was a great friend. The best, if Octavius was perfectly honest, that he’d ever had.</p><p>And if Octavius was even more honest… perhaps he felt that Jed was even a little more to him than that. But he knew that such ideas… such practices… they were not at all popular amongst the cowboys, so he kept that information carefully to himself. He’d settle for friendship if that was on the table, heck he’d settle for anything that allowed him to sit by Jed’s side like this, to feel his hand on his shoulder and to not be afraid of it being brushed away.</p><p>Perhaps cowboys weren’t all that comfortable with the idea of the Roman gods either, Octavius thought curiously. Because Jedediah had seemed truly quite perplexed, and even bothered by his mention of them.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Later that night, Jed was giving orders for the building of the railroad. Or rather, he was supposed to be giving orders for the building of the railroad. He was rather distracted, because all he could think about was that Mars fellow. And Octavius gasping underneath him. It was all rather irritating, Jed felt.</p><p>“No! No! No! Doggammit!” He yelled angrily. “Don’t waste any more of our piss-weak dynamite on tha’ there mountain! Tha’s just burning money!”</p><p>Jed bit his lip. Why did it make him so upset? He was supposed to be Octavius’ friend, which meant he should be happy for him, right? He stood up abruptly. “I’m headed back home. Y’all are useless.” He said, rather unkindly.</p><p>“We’re just doin’ our best.” One of the workmen said, looking up at him.</p><p>“Well yer best ain’t good enough.” Jed muttered, before stomping off.</p><p>Jed hung his hat up on his hat hook and sat down heavily on his bed. He sighed. It wasn’t the workmen’s fault. It was his. He couldn’t concentrate because… well, he wanted Octavius all to himself. It was hard to admit that. They had hated each other at first, but they had always sort of liked each other too. In fact, they had sort of loved hating each other. Now they loved being friends with each other. But perhaps, Jed considered, it was possible that they just plain loved each other. Or rather, that he just loved Octavius, and it was killing him that Octavius could love this Mars fella instead of him.</p><p>He wiped a tear from his cheek with a sniff. “I’m not cryin’!” He exclaimed to no one. “I’m not!”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“Take me to ‘im.” Jed said. “Take me to this Mars fella. I wanna duel him. I’m gonna shoot ‘im in ‘is stupid face!” He brandished his tiny pistol angrily and stomped his foot.</p><p>Octavius blinked a few times. “I’m sorry?”</p><p>“I said take me to your lover! I wanna fight him! Because you’re mine!” Jed exclaimed.</p><p>Octavius seemed stunned for a moment. Then he flushed pink in the cheeks. And then he quickly doubled over in laughter.</p><p>“Wha’s so funny?” Jed said.</p><p>“Mars isn’t my lover!” Octavius choked through laughter. “He’s not even a person, he’s the god of war! Conquering spirit! Us Romans, we pray to him, serve him, et cetera!”</p><p>Jedediah bit his lip and flushed bright red. “Oh… uhhh…” He stammered. “Shit.” He mumbled under his breath.</p><p>“Wait… What exactly were you imagining was going on?” Octavius sputtered, good humouredly. And then he blinked and his grin fell. “And what did you mean when you said that I was yours?”</p><p>Jed just stared at Octavius, too afraid to answer.</p><p>“I didn’t think cowboys engaged in… relationships of those sorts.” Octavius said, awkwardly.</p><p>“They don’t, really.” Jed said, scratching his head under his hat. “I just… I dunno.”</p><p>“You know, we Romans in fact… do. Engage in such relationships, I mean.” Octavius said.</p><p>“Really?” Jed whispered.</p><p>“Really.”</p><p>“Oh, tha’s good.” Jed said, nervously.</p><p>“Is that how… you feel about me?” Octavius asked.</p><p>Jed swallowed. “I think so.”</p><p>Octavius moved his fingers up to touch Jed’s hair. “You know, if you like, I could make you my slave… and my concubine?”</p><p>Jed wrinkled his nose. He didn’t much like the sound of that at all.</p><p>Octavius laughed. “I’m joking!”</p><p>“Oh!” Jed laughed with him. “Good.”</p><p>“But do you want to try? You know, being… something?” Octavius asked him. His hand had moved down to cradle Jed’s cheek now, and his face had drawn so close that Jed’s stomach was somersaulting.</p><p>“I think I do.” Jed breathed, and Octavius went in for a kiss.</p><p> </p><p>Larry was surprised when he saw the miniature cowboy and the miniature Roman general furiously making out with each other instead of watching over their respective territories from the table he’d set up for them. But he was not as surprised as one might have expected. He wondered if they might like it if he bought them an appropriately sized home (doll’s house), one that wasn’t made of bright pink plastic and that could actually… close. They deserved their privacy after all.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you like what I do here you can follow me on twitter @Writer_Monster or on my tumblr where I’m writer-monster</p><p>Also please let me know if you enjoyed and if you'd like more Jedtavius from me. I had a lot of fun writing/drawing these two tiny bois.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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